French Court Convicts Church of Scientology of Fraud

A Paris court has fined the Church of Scientology more than euro600,000 for pressuring members into paying large sums of money for questionable financial gain. Scientologists are asking people not to judge the entire religion based on the actions of a few bad thetans.

MySpace C.E.O. Reveals Plans to Improve Site

Owen Van Natta, MySpace chief executive, said at the Web 2.0 conference that he plans to stem the decline of members by cleaning up the site’s interface and eliminating marginal features. Van Natta attempted to show the new site at the conference, but couldn't get it to download in time.

People Seeking "Rebirth" Sent to Hospital

A total of 21 people in Arizona were sent to the hospital following a “vision quest” where they were told vomiting “was good for you, that you are purging what your body doesn’t want.” Participants were then featured on the cover of Vogue.

Corporations Reduce Waste Across U.S.

Across the nation, an antigarbage strategy known as “zero waste” is taking hold in corporations. Honda is recycling so diligently that some factories have gotten rid of their trash Dumpsters altogether. Meanwhile GM is reducing waste by closing nine more U.S. plants.

Researchers Create Memories in Fruitfly’s Brain

To better understand how the brain works, biologists at the University of Oxford shined light into a fruitfly’s brain, making it think it had a terrible experience. Scientists then stuck the fly's hand in warm water and giggled.

Barnes & Noble Introduces Electronic Reader

Barnes & Noble unveiled its version of an electronic reader called the Nook. The device will cost $259 and permit readers to lend their digital books to friends, and allow friends to digitally forget where they put the books or how long they've had them.

Soap Use Lacking in England

A campaign in Britain is encouraging people to use soap in public restrooms after a recent study found that only 65 percent of women and 31 percent of men regularly use soap when washing their hands. In related news, greeting people with a bow has become increasingly popular in England.

Transplant Patient Accepts "The Force" & New Kidney

Jazz saxophonist David S. Ware has successfully undergone a kidney transplant after refusing to do so for months for fear of having “someone else’s life force” in him. Ware is thankful for his new kidney, as well as his new found ability to play the spoons while tap dancing.

Weight-Loss Drugs Hope to Evade Side Effects

Three pharmaceutical companies are hoping to succeed in the battle for anti-obesity drugs that avoid side-effects like flatulence and loss of bowel control. The companies claim their products work more "harmoniously" with the digestive system, and include a cork in each bottle.

Even Rabbit Droppings Count in Nuclear Cleanup

A government contractor at the Hanford nuclear reservation in south-central Washington State has mapped out locations of radioactive rabbit feces from a helicopter, so workers can properly dispose of it. One worker tasked with the clean-up effort was apparently overheard saying, "I really should have gone to college."

Global Climate Deal Needs Funding

World leaders struggling to hash out a new global climate deal by December are finding that an even bigger hurdle than getting countries to reduce greenhouse gas emissions is figuring out how to pay for it. When the cost of the deal was presented, Canada slowly reached for its wallet, while the U.S. looked directly at China and said, "I promise I'll pay you back, man."

Walmart.com's Book Prices Could Damage Industry

Wal-Mart shaved another cent off its already rock-bottom prices for hardcover books, potentially damaging the industry. On Friday a spokeswoman for Wal-Mart said that the company would "continue to adjust our pricing so that Walmart.com offers the lowest prices on these top pre-sellers in books," adding, "in the hopes that our customers will finally learn to read."

Company Turns Digital Pics into Photo Albums

Pixable, a new company based in New York, allows users to create photo books from their pictures on the Web. After selecting images from Flickr, Picasa, and Facebook, an album is assembled and shipped to the user's house, where it can collect dust alongside photo albums from junior high school.

Boy in Balloon Found Alive

The 6-year-old boy who was believed to be in a home-made balloon over Denver has been found in a box in the attic of his family's Fort Collins home. His parents are grateful he's alive and well, and are now going to kill him.

Finding a Guide for Online Networking

Marc Prensky, author of “Digital Game-Based Learning,” advises older persons new to online job hunting to find young mentors to help them through the process, otherwise known as the newest excuse heard on "To Catch a Predator."

Connecticut to Scrutinize Food Labels

Connecticut Attorney General Richard Blumenthal is investigating a campaign that promotes products like Froot Loops and mayonnaise as nutritionally-smart choices. Blumenthal said the campaign is “overly simplistic, inaccurate and ultimately misleading,” to which Kellogg’s, General Mills, and PepsiCo responded, "...and your point is?"

Hybrid Cars Could Include Fake Noise for Safety

Safety experts are worried that the quiet motors of electric cars are a threat to pedestrians who can’t hear them, and would like automakers to supply the cars with a digitally-enhanced "vroom" noise — or for cars in urban areas, the digitally-enhanced sound of subwoofers blasting "Low" by Flo Rida.

Device Simulates Virginity

Conservatives in Egypt are furious over a new device that promises to simulate the bleeding a virgin bride experiences on her wedding night. Meanwhile, fans of "Sex and the City" and "Gossip Girl" are eagerly awaiting the device that simulates being a whore.

White House Begins Celebration of Music

A Latin music concert featuring the likes of Gloria Estefan and Marc Anthony, was held Tuesday night on the South Lawn as part of the White House Music Series. Vice President Joe Biden hailed the performance as another reason to maintain good relations with Mexico.

Justices Seem Sympathetic to Defendant

Several Supreme Court justices on Tuesday appeared sympathetic to a criminal defendant who said he plead guilty to a drug crime based on his lawyer’s advice. He said the same lawyer advised him to cheat on his wife, not file his 2008 taxes, and invest in Crystal Pepsi.

New Bridge in Main Experiments with Building Materials

A new brige in Maine has been constructed using 23 graceful arches of carbon- and glass-fiber fabric, filled with concrete. Designers at the Universtiy of Main say the bridge is an experiment in design, and hope it works better than the straw and chewing gum bridge they attempted last month.

Asprin May Have Boosted 1918 Flu Death Total

Experts are saying some of deaths during the 1918 flu epidemic may have been caused by overdoses of asprin, a new new “wonder drug” at the time. Coincidentally, the pharmaceutical industry released a report today urging people to "take it easy with the Valtrex."

Debate Follows Bills to Remove Clotheslines Bans

Opponents of line-drying clothing are saying new laws lifting bans on the practice are bringing down their property values. In the last year, lawmakers in Colorado, Hawaii, Maine and Vermont have overridden local rules with legislation protecting the right to hang laundry outdoors. Residents who enjoy line-drying are hoping lawmakers will also soon lift the ban on front-lawn vehicle storage.

Barack Obama Wins Nobel Peace Prize

In a stunning surprise, the Nobel Committee announced Friday that it had awarded its annual peace prize to President Obama "for his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples," otherwise known as "doing his job."

French Film Focuses on Overcrowded Prisons

The French movie “Un Prophète” (“A Prophet”), about France's deplorable prison conditions, has prompted France's parliament to institute the first bill since World War II that could lead to reforms. This move is being referred to in French political circles as the “Prophet effect,” much like "Basic Instinct 2" was referred to as the "Who thought this was a good idea?" effect.

YouTube Offers Parental Guidance

According to Nielsen VideoCensus, more children under 13 watched videos in August on YouTube than on Disney.com, Nick.com, and Cartoon Network combined. For parents, the idea of turning their children loose with such a vast amount of content can be frightening. However, YouTube does have a customization feature that allow parents to filter content, once their children show them how to use it.

Gov. Corzine Ad Plays on Challenger's Weight

A television ad for Gov. Jon S. Corzine shows his hefty challenger, Christopher J. Christie, stepping out of an S.U.V. in extreme slow motion, while the narrator says that Mr. Christie "threw his weight around" to avoid getting traffic tickets. In a phone call to Corzine, Christie admitted he did throw his weight around, adding "on your mother."

Leafy Greens Top List of Riskiest Foods

Leafy greens, like lettuce and spinach, are among the 10 riskiest foods, according to a study from The Center for Science in the Public Interest. Other foods on the list include scrambled eggs with arsenic, rat poison soup, and anything from Jack in the Box.

Mexico Creates Task Force to Protect Tourists

Officials from the Baja California cities of Tijuana, Ensenada, and Rosarito announced the creation of a task force to patrol a tourist corridor along those areas in an effort to better serve Americans. Other efforts to better serve Americans include doubling food portions at local taco stands and putting a Starbucks in every barrio.

Homeless Find Hope in Producing TV

A former TV and radio reporter is using cable television as an outreach to the homeless, by providing hands-on training in TV production for the St. Paul Neighborhood Network. The new recruits have even contributed to programming, which includes shows like, "Why Do You Need The Holy Ghost," "Bridging Heaven and Earth," and "How to Live Off a Pack of Skittles and an 8-Ball for a Week."

Africa Embraces Cell Phones

Africa has become the fastest-growing mobile phone market worldwide, and entrepreneurs and development organizations are eagerly seizing the opportunity presented by such growth, creating mobile phone applications for profitable and nonprofit ventures across the continent. Millions of Africans, for example, now use their mobile phones to transfer money, turn on water wells, and wish their loved ones goodbye before a genocide.

Dairy Farmers Strike Back

After months of complaints by European dairy farmers angry over low milk prices, protesters on Monday poured milk onto the streets and started fires that filled the air with black smoke. This is nothing, however, compared to the deadly haggis riots of '97.

Bake Sales Banned

In an effort to limit how much sugar and fat students consume at school, the New York Education Department has effectively banned most bake sales, a lucrative fund-raising tool used by teams and clubs. But students have already rebounded with new and innovative ways to raise money, such as selling plasma, dog fighting, and getting freshman hooked on smack.

Newspaper Seeks Weed Critic

Westword, an alternative weekly newspaper in Denver, is seeking a medical marijuana critic. Last week, the paper published a call for a freelance reviewer with a real, doctor-certified medical need, and received several dozen applications - most of them illegible and from the same person. While the paper acknowledges that Woody Harrelson has a lot of experience with marijuana, his prescriptions from "Dr. Dre" are questionable.

China Developing New TV Networks

China plans to spend billions of dollars in the next few years to develop media and entertainment companies to compete with the News Corporation and Time Warner. Officials say the new networks would feature shows such as "How I Met Your Mother: Through an Arranged Marriage," "The Real Housewives of Guangzhou," and China's version of "The Office" — "The Sweatshop."

Man Arrested Taping Erin Andrews

Michael David Barrett has been arrested and accused of secretly taping ESPN sports reporter Erin Andrews in the nude and posting the videos on the Internet. Barrett apparently checked into the same hotel at the same time as Andrews and asked for a room adjacent to her's, rigging her room's peephole to take videos. Barrett, however, ignored sports announcer John Madden, who was changing clothes in an adjacent room, with the door open.

No Climate and Energy Bill This Fall

President Obama’s top climate and energy official, Carol M. Browner, said Friday that there was virtually no chance Congress would have a climate and energy bill ready for him to sign before negotiations on a global climate treaty begin in December in Copenhagen. Browner, however, said the public can rest assured that the polar ice caps have been notified that they are to cease from melting until talks resume next year.

Center for Science in Washington Files Suit Against Bayer

The Center for Science in Washington has filed a lawsuit against Bayer Healthcare charging that the company’s labels and commercials falsely claimed its One A Day multivitamins for men may reduce the risk of prostate cancer. The group's next targets include Red Bull energy drink, which has no substantial evidence that it actually gives people "wings," and Calvin Klein Jeans, whose slogan, "Nothing comes between me and my Calvins," has repeatedly been proven false by former spokesmodel — and mother of two — Brook Shields.

iPhone Users Say They'd Switch Providers

The Apple iPhone has boosted AT&T's subscriber numbers, but complaints of network problems could hurt the company's reputation. AT&T, however, has not admitted to any problems and, according to AT&T spokesman Mark Siegel, offers users "the nation's fastest 3G network, now in 350 major metropol—"

China Marks 60th Anniversary

China’s leaders marked their nation’s 60th anniversary on Thursday with a precision display of military bravado. A confident President Hu Jintao said he "cannot be prouder of the development and progress of our great motherland," noting "Tiananmen Square was sooo 1989."

The People’s Armed Police had specially outfitted armored personnel carriers, a signal of their growing stature. While their performance in Tibet was widely criticized, President Hu praised their performance in the parade, saying it was comparable to that of Janet Jackson's 1990 Rhythm Nation video.